Bossa Nova (Yelp Event)

On February 2, 2012, I attended a Yelp function at Bossa Nova Ballroom. Several food vendors were present, including Pine State Biscuits, The Original Diner, and Crave Bake Shop.

Yelp Elites had exclusive access for an hour (6 p.m. to 7 p.m.). After that, the event was opened to other Yelpers. There was alcohol at the event, but I passed on it. Heard it was a good selection. I only stayed for the Elite hour, then left. I had already been eating for about six straight hours by that point, and a food coma was imminent.

My Yelp review, posted mere hours after the event, appropriately sums up my positive experience. Pictures will follow my review Enjoy!
___________________

(Review posted on Yelp 2/4/12)

(Reads sign at The Original booth)
"Pork apple fritters and bacon icing."
(grabs food, eats, blacks out from experience)

(Goes to Pine State Biscuits booth)
"Biscuits and Gravy...mushroom gravy or sausage gravy"
(takes a bowl, eats, blacks out again)

(Goes to Crave Bake Shop booth)
"Gluten-free, dairy-free hot chocolate cupcakes!"
(does a happy panda dance in my head)

Yeah, you get the point. The food was awesome.

Oh yeah, a vivid event actually happened. Am I allowed to mention it in more detail on this site, or should I have stuck to the first rule of Fight Club? Guess I already failed on that. Um, am I even allowed to take photos of this? Out of professionalism, I didn't, but I'll never be able to look at a skateboard or listen to "The Power of Love" the same way ever again. Who woulda thunk "Back to the Future" would have such a vivid effect? Thanks, Don B. Or should I say..."DOC!!!! DOC!!!!" :-)

For food, the aforementioned pork apple fritter was the star. The quintessential combination of sweet and savory met a slightly crunchy exterior. Bacon icing is the bomb diggity. It'll be a regular menu item at The Original very soon. Holy mother of win!

The seafood chowder from Salty's also deserves a mention. Just money. So I can't pull off the saying like Guy Fieri (and will never be mistaken for him), but whatever. It's delicious.

Since I was driving, no alcohol for me again, but would it have been OK to do several shots of bacon icing instead? Oh, too weird, eh? Sad panda.

While the food and company were great, as always, I have to say the experience was not necessarily five stars overall. In general, I'm not a fan of the bar or club-like scenes, preferring the quieter, intimate functions. Also, the lines for food (if going at the wrong time) was the equivalent of an orderly zoo. I'm personally happy I got my few bites in. But I snapped pics of most of the food, so I consider that a win.

Thanks again, Don B., for a cool event!

Biscuit w/mushroom gravy from Pine State Biscuits

Pork apple fritter w/bacon icing
Worship the pig!

Crave Bake Shop was there! Yes!

It's glorious...!

Banh mi samplers

Potato salad

Seafood chowder!

Torta-Landia

Torta-Landia is a small bar located on SE 60th Ave. in Portland, Oregon. It's actually not far from the Carts on Foster food pod.

OK, so I'm likely one of the last guys you'd see in a bar nowadays. I used to drink my fair share (thanks a lot, undergrad and law school), but now, I prefer to get wasted on food.

Warning: food drunkenness can be agonizing and cause food comas, rendering the person less capable of operating a vehicle.

I came in on a Thursday afternoon to an empty place. Realized the place had just opened. Cool, that means I can get in, order my food, and leave. Ninja style!

Wrestling stuff? A title belt as well...neat!

That's a nice special for loyal customers!
Buy nine tortas, get one free!
I'll assume that you don't have to purchase all nine at once

Torta-Landia, as the name implies, means tortas (Mexican sandwiches) are on the menu. They also got burritos and drinks.

The Carnitas del Diablo burrito stood out, and you probably know why. Slow-roasted carnitas, sauteed with habaneros and jalapenos, topped with borracho beans, green rice, cilantro-lime crema, quaso oaxaca, and habanero salsa. We gotta play with some devilish pork! I waited for a bit as the guy cooked my burrito to order.

(Guy hands me a burrito the length of a limo)

Carnitas del Diablo Burrito
(Tortalandia)

Yum...

OK, this bad boy has to weigh a few pounds. Filled with starchy goodness and porky awesomeness. Oh, I see some minced habaneros in there! Digging in!

Juicy pulled pork, excellent rice (not very gummy, so it still had an identity). The cheese and crema helped bring everything together, the latter livening the palate up.

Wait. Um...hello? Where's the heat? (scratches head, bites again...and again...and again)

Are these placebo habaneros? Sad panda! Perhaps an insufficient amount of peppers for my brain to get the message. My at-home spicy food training sessions worked too well! I'll have to ask for more habaneros (and habanero salsa) next time.

The burrito is extremely filling and decent. The dam did not burst with mega flavors. Instead, I experienced a calming stream of balanced ingredients. While I appreciate the balanced, juicy filling, I'd rather get bombarded with asskicking flavors that would make Chuck Norris proud. But no roundhouse kicks, please.

Ultimately, I feel like this burrito (especially when advertised) coulda given me a fireworks show to glisten my face. Instead, I drove off with a heavy stomach carrying defused explosives. 6.75/10

Cackalack's (Part 3)

(Original Review -- July 2011)
(Second Review -- December 2011)

I keep giving Cackalack's Hot Chicken Shack extra lives. I'm beginning to wonder if they shoulda had a cat somewhere in the name or logo. This time, I came back because management had changed since my previous visit.

You know what...the Cackalack's sign and the hypnotizing effect of spicy food. It's their doing! Who can resist a female bird in high heels in sexy clothing holding a bucket of hot chicken? It's the...the eyes! That's it, the eyes got me!

(If you don't know what I'm talking about, please go to their website)

Menu
(February 2012)

XXX sauce. Habanero-based. One of the "legal drugs" spicy nutcases like me salivate on. The sauce is like crack, man! Wonder what happens if you snort it. OK, bad idea.

The Blazer ($7) is their most popular sandwich. A "boneless fried chicken breast on a Fleur de Lis sesame brioche bun with smoky slaw, homemade pickles, & garlic baby dill aioli." Chicken is coated in sauce of your choice. XXX the chicken and let me at it!

"Blazer" sandwich w/XXX sauce
(Cackalack's Hot Chicken Shack)

Better closeup of the fried chicken w/XXX sauce on it

(Distressed, torturous-sounding chicken clucking in the background)

That had to be some of the juiciest white meat I've ever had. The XXX sauce nuked me the first time I had it many months ago, but my built-up tolerance led to a smoky, pleasurable experience. The colorful slaw was crunchy. Mad skill on the homemade pickles; they added more dimension to this one.

The XXX sauce left a small red oily pool, and part of the sandwich lay in it. Not necessarily the best image, but the Blazer still blazed one heck of a trail from my mouth to my stomach.

Oh, and no bad spicy aftereffects for me. Win!

OK, I give in. I'm a fan of Cackalack's. Probably long overdue, too. So after all my rambling typing, ladies and gents, the moral of the story is to put up a suggestive sign for your business and add a lot of spice to the food to reel me in. 7.5/10

Sushi PDX (Part 2)

(Original Review -- December 2011)
(My Food Carts Portland article -- February 2012)

I ventured back to Sushi PDX in early February. My previous experience was average, but I felt it was my fault for not eating the sushi hand roll completely fresh out of the cart.

Rip City Grill

Rip City Grill is a sandwich food cart located at the corner of SW Moody and Abernathy, near the waterfront in Portland, Oregon. The term "Rip City" was first used by Bill Schonely in the 1970s when referring to the NBA's Portland Trail Blazers.

Clint is the man running Rip City Grill. He closed for winter break, but re-opened on February 1. Even when arriving the next day at lunchtime, he had a line going for his food. Must be damn good!

Workers in the area convene for Clint's sandwiches!

While there are several items on his menu, I came for his tri-tip sandwich.

I love beef. It's one of those times where we need the Dr. Seuss books to help out. "I will have it on a boat, I will eat it with a goat...oh, but then I'll also eat the goat so I must wash it down with a beer float." OK, so maybe that's the adult version.

After ordering the sandwich, you can also ask for one of Clint's add-on styles. All fantastic choices, I must say. Wait. Oh crap. "El Caliente." Pepperjack cheese (cheese of awesomeness) with sauteed onions and jalapenos. Must have now.

Menu (February 2012)

"Add-On Styles" for your sandwiches!

Clint: "Would you like some BBQ sauce as well?"
Me: *thinks* "Hell yeah!" (actually replied more professionally than that)

Tri-Tip Sandwich, El Caliente Style
(Rip City Grill)

The use of "Rip City" shall now also include ripping my taste buds with kickass ingredients.

The tri-tip slices were juicy and flavorful. The tri-tip appeared to dip into the well-done category, but that's mad skill to keep it juicy. The jalapenos and onions had nice crunch, the slightest spice emanating from the peppers. Cheese = win. The sweet/tangy BBQ sauce turned this sandwich into a mighty struggle. My jeans and hoodie sustained BBQ sauce battle scars. I still won. Hahaha, take that, (awesomely) evil sandwich!

Paid just $7 for that, a good deal for such quality. Check out Rip City Grill and get some tri-tip! 8.5/10

Holy Cannoli (Part 2)

(UPDATE 10/15/12: After a few months spent at the Green Castle food pod, Holy Cannoli closed its doors on October 13. Jessy and Tami are moving to Sonoma County, CA, and will be bringing their awesome food to the area. Best wishes to these two great people!)

(Original Review -- November 2011)

Since I was in the area, I walked about a half-mile (one way) to the Foster food pod (SE 52nd and Foster) to re-visit Holy Cannoli Wicked Italian.

Prickly Ash

(NOTE: In February 2013, Prickly Ash announced the closing of its cart at the Mississippi Marketplace pod. They still plan to do catering events in the summer.)

(Second Review -- March 2012)

Prickly Ash is a Chinese-inspired street food cart located at the Mississippi Marketplace food pod (corner of N Mississippi and Skidmore) in Portland, Oregon. They currently occupy the same cart Garden State worked out of.

Karen and Scott on opening night!
FYI, the customer is Jamey, the cart owner at Burgatroyd