Saturday, January 14, 2012

Fire on the Mountain (NE Fremont)

(Original Review -- May 2011 Burnside location)
(Second Review -- October 2011 Burnside location)

Fire on the Mountain's newest location is on NE Fremont in Portland, Oregon. Basically, I had a mission to set my mouth on fire. Since NE Fremont is the only FOTM location right now that serves pizza, I had to try it. As a result, this will be a separate review and a separate rating.


Whoa wait, what's this? El Jefe Pizza? You mean these guys put that same diabolical wing sauce in with the marinara? Bleu cheese, mozzarella, and jalapenos? Dang, sign me up!


Pizza menu at NE Fremont location!
El Jefe Challenge...15 wings in five minutes. Good grief.
I've attempted the challenge when it was 12 wings and no time limit. Pain.
The server at the counter looked at me funny as I ordered the 12" pizza, a $15 pie that became $17 by adding chicken. It was that "Are you really sure you want this pizza?" inquisitive look. Uh, yes, I've eaten the El Jefe wings and survived (although I didn't do the challenge). Me want pizza!

Several minutes later, my pizza arrived to test my gastric mettle. A well-done, crispy crust, with dark blotches all around the pie crust edges. I found that very appealing.

12" El Jefe Pizza
(Fire on the Mountain)
Love this closeup shot!
I figured speed was key to getting through all the slices, so I pretty much ate like a reckless caveman. I started to sweat after the second slice, but eh, whatever...keep eating! My throat burned, and I realized I only had one pitiful napkin. Oops, gotta call for reserve napkins!

I polished off seven slices on the 12" pie of torture, letting my good friend have the last portion. After taking a bite, she probably wondered how (and why) the heck I would subject myself to such pain. One bite of the inner good stuff and one bite of the crust, and that was it for her. But hey, kudos for at least trying it. She clearly enjoyed her six raspberry habanero wings ($5.95) more than the El Jefe pizza.

Oh, and even though this was lunchtime, this was already at least my fifth meal of the day. Please secure my room at the loony house! Reservation for Aaron!

While I liked the pizza (fresh out of the oven, stringy cheese, crispy crust, etc.), I felt like I ingested a good week's worth of saturated fat. Holy grease monkey! Yup, the El Jefe sauce temporarily burned my innards. But I'm all good, no problems! Above-average pizza, with extra points for the kickass spice (almost literally)! 7.5/10

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